Xavier's Journey
2014
Second baby
Lived in: Kaeo, Northland
WHERE WAS YOUR PLANNED PLACE OF BIRTH?
Whangarei Hospital
WHERE WAS YOUR ACTUAL PLACE OF BIRTH?
Whangarei Hospital
XAVIER'S BIRTH
What a journey to have our little man here! Here is our story:
Losing our baby in 2012 was a most heartbreaking experience. Despite this we knew we were ready to be parents and wanted to try again for another baby, finding out we were pregnant again just days before what would have been our son's first birthday.
Pregnancy
The first three months of pregnancy were typical, tired, small amount of morning sickness. We had a dating scan at 9 weeks, merely to check in and see there was a baby in there, check baby was ok, make it real. The scan showed a nine day difference to the due dates calculated by my period, an annoyance as I feared it would mean I would be recommended to be induced, rather than risk going overdue.
We had our anatomy scan early at 16 weeks (17 according to scan!). All was perfect, a relief. A low lying placenta was noted, though not uncommon and likely would move away from the cervix as the uterus grew. We went on holiday, happy. A couple of days later I had some pinky brown spotting, a small amount, but enough to make us nervous and careful. It stopped after a day or so. All continued normally.
Due to our history we had requested shared obstetric and local midwife care this time around. Growth scans accompanied the obstetric appts, starting at 20 weeks.
At 24 weeks I had my first bleed, though not a lot (a few tablespoons?) it was fresh and bright red. We called our Kerikeri Midwife who assessed us at Kawakawa Maternity Unit. A scared and tearful drive to Whangarei Hospital followed, steroid injection to help mature baby's lungs in case I was to go into premature labour. I stayed in Whangarei Maternity for the weekend, the bleeding stopped by itself. We wanted a scan to check why the bleed occurred, low lying placenta / placenta previa was thought to be the culprit. We went home with the plan to come back immediately if any more bleeds occurred.
They did. At 26 weeks, another bleed, another night in Whangarei Hospital. We went home not knowing when this may happen again or how heavy the next bleed may be. Three days later, another bigger bleed. We were lucky to have family staying with us and they drove me to meet hubby halfway, then onward to Whangarei. At this point we realised that it was unsafe for me to be home alone whilst he was at work, and so began my 'social admission', staying in Whangarei Maternity Unit for 3 days per week while hubby worked, and modified bed rest when at home. Placenta previa was unpredictable, a bleed could remain small or worsen to a haemorrhage. So we remained careful. Each week that passed was a blessing.
Christmas came, we were now 34 weeks along. We went to our growth scan and obstetric appt expecting to be booking in for a caesearean section mid January. The previous scan three weeks earlier showed the placenta was still covering the cervix, 'blocking bubs exit'. This time the obstetrician just about did a backflip - he had told us it wouldn't move, but it had moved 8cm and we could try for a vaginal birth! Went home, allowed to go back to 'life as normal', to think about whether we would want induced labour or spontaneous labour.
And we gave it a lot of thought. I was scared of being induced. But were were taking a risk to go to term, possibly overdue? Which date was right - scan or my period dates?
Friday
On Friday 24th Jan we had our final obstetric appt, we decided we would be induced 5th February if bubs didn't arrive spontaneously prior. It felt good to have made a decision, a plan was in place. We went out for lunch, I wondered if I was imagining Braxton Hicks now we had decided on a date, as was feeling mild tightenings.
Saturday
4am and up to pee, finding pinky red spotting when wiping. Excited but back to bed and waiting to see what next. An hour later and another pee and found that the mucus plug had come away, was this our first signs of labour? Still only mild Braxton Hicks, very slight period cramp, spotting stopped but I felt things must be changing down there. We got our bags packed and had a restful day, still waiting for something to change.
Sunday
Sunday morning still no change, though I mentioned to hubby that baby didn't seem to be moving as much. The midwife had said baby's movements are different at the end of pregnancy as baby has run out of room, but the frequency should still be the same. We laid there, hubby's hand on my tummy, one kick. Slightly reassured, we started our day.
I paid attention throughout the day, felt maybe four single movements spaced out over the day where usually there would be more at the same time. Our Kerikeri Midwife called to check if any changes (as had told her of the mucus plug), I mentioned the movements and she said 'to tune in to baby's movements' and if we were worried we could come in and be checked. I decided to have a cold drink and laid down to see if baby would be more active. Laying there, I remember thinking "please baby, please move" ... starting to worry ... one kick.
Hubby had been out, I told him what had been going on and recognised I didn't need to feel anxious when I could easily just go in and a get checked. So we went. I felt like I would be wasting the midwives time, it was a terrible rainy day, and we had just had a midwife appt in Kerikeri on Thursday, and the scan and obstetric appt Friday. But I also kept thinking of a couple I met in hospital who thought their baby had stopped moving, luckily they were checked and baby was born by emergency csection and was ok. If anything was wrong there was no use in us leaving it until after baby's movements had stopped completely.
2pm
As we drove down our (bumpy, rural) driveway, I had a Braxton Hick that took more concentration. "I wonder if that was just a mild contraction?" I said to hubby. By the time we got to Kerikeri roundabout I'd had 5, totalling 11 by the time we got to Kawakawa. "There's something to these" I thought, so timed them: 45 seconds long and 6 mins apart. They weren't painful, but I had to concentrate on breathing through them.
We walked to the consult room in Kawakawa Maternity to meet our midwife. Hooked up to CTG, we heard the heartbeat, "all sounds good" she said. I told her I thought I had just started having contractions on the drive, then one happened while we were on the CTG. The audio was turned on and we heard baby's heart slow and slow further and nearly stop. That's not normal in early labour. "Ok, I am going to call an ambulance, we are going to get you to Whangarei. I expect you will be looking at a csection".
Ok, do whatever we have to do!
The ambulance arrived within minutes, the midwife and I hopped in and off we went, hubby drove our car. Only then did I realise how critical the situation was. That the scene that was playing out was what should have happened with our first baby. I cried. I was sick from stress and from lying down with the motion of the ambulance. The midwife stroked my hair. Now all I could do was hope and trust everything would be ok this time around.
We got to the hospital and everything was prepped for us to go to theatre immediately. Changed into the hospital gown, hopped on the bed and was wheeled toward theatre. Hubby arrived as I was being wheeled down the hall. I explained what was happening - it will be an emergency cesarean under general anaesthetic. "I love you" I said as we left each other, my heart going out to him having to wait outside for news that all was ok.
20 people surrounded me prepping with iv lines, catheter, oxygen & gas. All I could do was lay there crying. I still needed to concentrate on my breathing, just not the way I expected if had been in labour, but as aid to stay calm and trust all would be ok. Please let our baby be ok. They put the Doppler on my tummy, we heard a heartbeat, thank god. Our midwife held my hand as I drifted into the anaesthetic, consciously holding my two babies in my heart. So grateful hubby's sister drove from Auckland immediately to support him, us, as he waited alone for news that we were both ok.
4.59pm, baby is born
Waking in recovery, groggy, hubby was asking to see me. Where was baby? In SCBU, he was unwell. He was a boy! Proud dad showed me some photos. Then I was wheeled in the bed down to SCBU to see our baby. So small, only 6pound 1oz, smaller than they thought on the scans. On oxygen, iv lines and meds, so many wires that we could hardly see his face. Here's my baby but I can't hold him. A strange feeling to meet your baby while groggy and on morphine. Will he be ok? We wait and see and hope.
His was treated for low blood pressure, high temp (possible infection), respiration, on so many meds. His recovery was very quick, every time we went in there was news of improvement. I expressed breast milk and rested to recover from surgery. First cuddle Monday night, first breastfeed Tuesday! That feed helped me start to feel like he was mine. Wed morning he had a name! And was rooming in with us. We suddenly felt the weight of responsibility, we have to care for this baby now - felt a bit clueless, first time parenting!
We stayed in hospital 5 nights. The Whangarei Maternity and SCBU staff were amazing. Knowing our story, losing our first baby, placenta previa and now nearly losing this baby and having him in SCBU... they really went above and beyond, and gave us a two bedroom room where Hubby was able to stay, a man admitted on the maternity ward! They said we needed to be together. We will be grateful forever.
The placenta was sent away for testing, though results were inconclusive. It seems to us that it was not formed properly from the beginning, placenta previa, velatemous cord insertion (on side of placenta rather than centre), a two vessel cord, and that part of the maternal side was 'disrupted' at some point so wouldn't have been functioning properly. A different set of symptoms, unrelated to our first son.
We are hapy to say he is now a strong, healthy, thriving boy and you wouldnt know that he'd had such a rough start!
Things you would do the same?
I know our story prob sounds like a horror one to many mums. But the thing is, I feel our biggest fear surrounding labour was the fear of the unknown. I have laboured with a drug free vaginal birth, and had an emergency csection under a general anaesthetic. Each of these were far worse to stress about prior, than to actually experience. I found the recovery from the csection surprisingly quick - at home I was on pain meds (paracetamol and ibuprofen) for a short two weeks post surgery, and of course took things easy for the two months afterward.
With our history we would again opt for shared midwife and obstetric care. And though I would love to labour and birth naturally again, we would also be heavily inclined to have an elective cesarean. I don't think we could hear heart decellerations ever again, even if it is normal in the late stage of labour.
Things you would do differently?
We could have easily stayed home that Sunday as thought surely everything would be fine, we only just had a scan two days ago. I wouldn't hesitate next time - if any worries at all just go!
Though the growth scans were reassuring for us mentally, it was apparent that they are just a guide. The scan we had two days before baby was born guessed his weight was 3.5kg, he was born only 2.7kg. The scans are good for checking anatomy however and that's huge for peace of mind.
What advice would you recommend to other Northland mums / families?
BABYS MOVEMENT: A most crucial gauge to baby's well being in pregnancy is paying attention to baby's movements. The obstetrician and midwives both said it's even more accurate than scans and Doppler. I never realised how important this was. As I sit here gratefully with Xavier in my arms I know the awareness around babys movements saved our boys life.
Speaking to many mums it is apparent there is so much emphasis put on the 'birth experience' rather than the 'birth outcome'. If we hadn't been through our loss then maybe I would have felt guilty for having a csection, like I had somehow failed. I feared a caesearean but I wouldn't change a thing, our boy is here!
Make sure you have good support (professional and family or friends). Trust that you will cope with whatever happens in your pregnancy and birth, you CAN do it and are stronger than you know!
